Opportunities Lost from Lack of Sleep

Every day is a new opportunity to start life afresh and every day with insomnia leads to disappointment and exhaustion. So many opportunities go by all thanks to tiredness.Even when I’m exhausted I try to convince myself that tomorrow will be better and I can try to start to put some of my ideas into practice. New business ideas, art ideas, even ideas for a cleaner house.

I often wonder if insomnia is simply a way of procrastination. Maybe I never would amount to anything even if I did sleep. But not getting to try is far worse than failing. The amount of time I used to sit and waste, slothing on the couch, trying to have a catnap or listening to meditation tapes during the day with a view to falling asleep, I could have instead written a book, ran a business, even put my old photos in albums. All things I could be doing but put off as I’m too tired to be bothered.

I have lost so many jobs from having this attitude. Try as I may to have enthusiasm and zest for a job when my eyes feel like sandbags are hanging from them, my body is aching and my head feels like it can’t survive without Panadol’s or a swift drink, I simply can’t focus on anything other than planning a good nights rest.I have a CV full of some of the best jobs anyone could have had and I’ve won some of the biggest awards in the world for my work. So it’s strange to think I only have about two great references and one of those people has already died. I dread going for an interview and being asked to give the name of a referee. I don’t have any. My past employers have either asked me to leave or I have left when they wanted me to stay. All because I’ve been too tired. Luckily I manage to excel in short bursts and have somehow managed to achieve more than most.

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